Much needed

Sometimes things really seem to suck. Nothing seems to go the way you are hoping it too. I've had alot of times like that in the last little bit. I've been trying to loose weight and this is week 5. Two of those weeks though there was no weight loss and it was definately frustrating. It's hard to work out and try to eat right just to see that it isn't enough. I have tried on numerous occasions to get my weight into check, all failed attempts. I don't want to fail this time. I want it to work out for me.

This week I was hoping to see another loss. I was pleasantly surprised at what I saw. Not only did I loose but I dropped 5 lbs!!!!!! That is as much as I have lost since starting this time. I am only 15lbs away from my first goal and it feels more real now, like I can do it. It is something very achievable, not just words. I try to eat well all week and then on Saturdays it's my free day. I have been finding that even on Saturdays I don't want to eat as much. Just the sheer amount of food that I consume has dropped. I can't eat as much sugary, greasy stuff that I use to. I can still eat it but in moderation, not like before.

This weekend is my sons birthday party and I had to decide what to serve. It's on my cheat day so it doesn't matter what I put out, I can eat it. It has come down to birthday cake, all 4 year olds need birthday cake, a fruit tray, chips and meat, cheese and cracker tray (I think). I'm going out tomorrow to buy all the fruit I need and extra, fruit is a very good thing in my home. The kids and I can't get enough of it. For his party I have some healthy options and then some not so much. I don't have to feel guilty for eating what I want Saturday afternoon.

This is working for me and my kids. I'm getting happy again.

Roller Coaster

That's what I feel like i'm on lately. I just wish I could stay on the top - or at least most of the way up. Bad things this week is that I didn't loose any weight again, hubby fell again and has missed even more work. Good things are my little mans birthday party for his friends is on Friday and he is very excited, also, I have a job interview today.

Now the job interview could go either way. I'm loving being able to stay home with my kids again, it's great. But on the other hand making money is great too. I wish I new what to do about this. I'm going to go to the interview and see what they have to say at least. Find out as much as I can. I'm really hoping I can get a Monday to Friday job again, it works best for my family. That means I will also have to get Timothy into daycare again. As much fun as he had I don't know if I can do that. I do NEED to have his first day of school off, no way can I miss that, it's to important of a day for him. Working and bringing home a paycheque again will be nice though, I wish that I could fill up my daycare and have work, money and be home with my kids.